“Life is not what you think. You might think one way but it's all une illusion grande un grand mensonge. Makes you wonder about life. Doesn't it?”
Vittoria posted this at 10:25 AM on Monday, on her home page.
One minute after I read it, Francesca popped up in my IM box. She asked me if I had heard anything from her sister. I said sort of, and copied and pasted Vittoria’s short philosophical musing.
After a few moments Francesca said she is very angry at Vittoria for not showing up and making her surgery appointment. Everyone thought for sure she would, and now they are enormously disappointed. And scared.
Francesca also said that her father is deeply depressed. He just sits around the house. Or goes out for long walks. He isn’t saying much.
Has he acknowledged, directly or indirectly, that Vittoria was adopted? No, Francesca replied, he just says he needs to talk to her before anyone else. But he hasn’t denied it. What else could it be?
And what is Nonna up to? She’s cooking. Lasagna. She says it calms her.
Francesca said she wanted to ask me a question. I said go ahead.
“How come she contacted you rather than me?”
“Because she doesn’t love you anymore,” I replied.
“That was a JOKE,” I said.
“She didn’t actually send that message to me,” I said. “She just put it on her home page. Maybe she figured I’d eventually come across it, and pass it on.”
“Do you think so?”
“It’s just one of many possibilities. I can’t know for sure.”
* * *
Now I’m in a peculiar state of mind. On the one hand I feel an obligation to be compassionate, understanding. Vittoria’s world, after all, has been turned upside down. She’s struggling to figure out who she is.
On the other, I’m fed up and angry with her irresponsibility and silence. And I’m wondering what I should do next.
Hang in there? Or move the hell on.
What would YOU do?